United States of Cars

by Mark Chmiel

for K. M. Schwartz

Be cool in your car
Make out in your car
Drink tequila in your car

Listen to Led Zeppelin cranked in your car
Go from point A to point Z in your car
Transport various and sundry drugs in your car

Zone out road-trip escapism in your car
Impress your friends with your car
Lovingly wash and wax your car

Buy your car like it’s a new born miracle
Flirt from your car
Speed 25 miles over the limit in your car

Drag-race like James Dean badass in your car
Pollute the planet every second in your car
Guzzle gas without giving a fuck in your car

Activate sunroof or moonroof pleasure in your car
Give insurance agents steady work with your wreck of a car
Attend prom in someone else’s car

Never hear Ralph Nader’s phrase “psycho-sexual killing machine” about your car
Place all those shopping bags in the back seat of your car
Know all the models and makes of cars while not knowing the names of your governor or senators

Identify with your car
Give a special, quirky name to your car
Judge others by their cars

Experience liberation from home in your car
Savor psychic breakthroughs on cross-country road trips in your car
Revel in going anywhere anytime you want in your car

Think people’s cars say something revealing about them
Hear someone pronounce the word “Lambourgini” as if the Risen Christ had just appeared
Cruise in your dream car with your dream lover in your nocturnal dreams

Go one mile an hour on highway headed home in your car
Drool for joy to pump $1.79/gal. in your car
Remember US troops protecting Iraqi Ministry of Oil for the sake of freedom and your car

 

—from Spiritual Exercises class, October 2015

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